Devastating reports of loss and sadness fill the news and I weep for those whose voices will never be heard, whose legs will never work again and whose hearts have been broken.
A man. No. A boy, curls in the bowels of a bloodied boat, a white tarp flapping in the wind above him. What must he be thinking? What did he do? And why? I weep for him too. For innocence lost. I tell my husband, it’s like he’s in a cocoon in that boat. He will emerge a changed man, but not in the way it’s supposed to be. For this I weep deeply.
Days later I walk my daughter to school. I see a young man in black. I notice his back pack. Also black. His ball cap. Black. I watch him walk into the school without a child. My heart quickens. By the time I get back home from dropping my daughter off, I am a mess. Sobbing into my husbands arms. What if? What if?
I take it to The Lord. What do I do with this? Do I call the school?
The Lord speaks two words to me. “My will.”
And in my panic I say: “So you want me to just sit back and watch the school blow up because it’s your will?”
That’s what fear does.
It turns somebody’s daddy into a terrorist right before your eyes.
The Holy Spirit prompted me to speak the Lords prayer and in those moments I understood that he was asking me to trust him. To turn to HIM. So as hard as it was for me and my big ugly imagination, I went about my day trusting the Lord, not running to the school creating panic.
At the end of the day when I picked up my daughter I saw the same man walk right past me and look me in the eye. He smiled. I smiled back. Somebody’s daddy.
What fears are you facing right now in your life?
We can overcome our fear in the midst of dark days if we seek the Lord.
Deuteronomy 13:4 Serve only the Lord your God and fear him alone. Obey his commands, listen to his voice and cling to him.
